As a child, usually driving with my father (one always risked one’s life driving with my mother – and couldn’t truly appreciate the local color as we attempted to keep her on-the-road), I used to gaze at-all-of-the-homes we would pass, and try to guess the personalities of the people who resided within – as I believed that the exterior of these Detroit suburban houses had to say something about the folks residing within. Naturally, the interior of a home says much, much more about a person – but I always felt there were some clues provided in bricks, and roof pitch, and shutters and landscaping: was there a scholar in there; or a good, blue-collar, union guy; or a heavy drinker with a big mouth; or a minister; or, some fastidiously neat fellow?
On my way to work this morning, cruising down Mulholland Hwy (those of you having read ‘My Drive to Work’ are certainly in-the-know), I was admiring some of the incredible homes during our mini-monsoon (starkly colorful and clear with heavy rains) – when I saw a fellow who perfectly fit the type of Cali Dude I imagined lived in-one-of-these “almost Malibu” homes: a tall, silver-haired (but ageless looking), well built guy – wearing one-of-those classic flannel shirts – picking up his morning paper: A rugged looking individual who fit the rugged landscape.
That latest image got me thinking about my childhood reveries – but also about how I fell in love with Giti – who had created, and continues to create, living spaces that provide me that return-to-the-womb security: where everything has its place; and, everything has its function.
There was a brief period of time in-my-life that I guess I could have considered myself as being on my own – probably about 3-or-so-years of college, and, one brief post-divorce year. I certainly didn’t have many material possessions to keep track of, and, I was very much interested with the cultivation of house plants (and, no, these were NOT the ‘other’ plants – the other plants I cultivated in my outside gardens with varying degrees of success) – but I did manage to keep MY things in the places that I wanted them, and, always knew if something was missing. But aside from this brief, organized time – the rest of my time was spent either married, or married with children, or, parenting – and during these periods of time – I never seemed able to find what I needed (unless it pertained to my computer files).
But with Giti – I have experienced a place where (alles ist in Ordnung [that’s everything is in order]) – which I have suggested is a “womb experience” for me. It’s not that I am spoiled (which my friends suggest I am) – it’s simply that Giti knows where EVERYTHING I need is…from nail clippers to demo CDs – She’s got it covered. And when She sends me off to fetch something – she gives me very explicit directions on where to locate the object of her desire. So You might say – so what if Little Stevie’s life is finally organized! How does the World benefit from this-state-of-affairs?! Well let me tell you why this is so goddamned important to me…it’s so goddamned important because it allows me to compose music again! Yep! Just like the visits home to my piano (the one that I was schooled on) I returned to a home where alles war in Ordnung. Yep! My folks also maintain a meticulously organized home – so, I guess in Giti, I have found someone who organizes an environment that sufficiently structures me to compose with abandon.
And so now I can weep for the devastated and homeless in Haiti – and throughout the World – hoping and praying that for many, starlight is the only ceiling they require to feel at home…for hopefully: Home is where the Heart Lies.