October 1, 2022 (My father would have been 100 years old today.)
There is some dispute as to how old Ollie III (our goldfish) was — and there is also some dispute as to whether He was a goldfish — as He never assumed the rich golden color that most goldfish do in the 9 years we had him (there is some dispute about this figure also).
Whatever, he was the last remaining fish in the Pet Smart tank for a Nowruz celebrated 8-or-9- years-ago…He must have been the runt of the litter (er, school?) since everyone else had passed on Him — and I was desperate to get the obligatory Nowruz goldfish for our festivities.
So, He occupied the corner of our dining room for more than 8-and-a-half years or fewer than 9-and-a-half years (and we\’re no longer counting).
Once in our home — the little fellow assumed his throne and regulated our household from that corner of the dining room. With Ollie swimming merrily about — we could answer the bell of every new day.
But now the empty space has thrown us off balance…there\’s no Tiny Tim…
I often wondered what it was like for Him (and we are assuming that Ollie was a He and not a She) swimming around that bowl interminably and seeing the same sights day-in-and-day-out.
Ironically, I found myself meditating more on His existence (can we call it a Life?) lately than I normally would. I was probably more conscious of Him because as a retiree — I no longer had the volume of grading I once had (could this extra attention have been toxic to Him?)
Dinner time was of course Ollie\’s favorite time of the day — and He would swim to where He could see Me after I called Him to dinner. His meals were consumed with gusto.
People often told us that we should cover His bowl in case he jumped out. Yes, Ollie lived in a free-standing fish bowl which Giti cleaned on a monthly basis — and after 9 years of that routine — it seems He liked it. In fact, on His last bowl cleaning — Giti called my attention to His apparent enjoyment of His \”bath.\”
So if he didn\’t jump out of the bowl in His youth — we wondered what would have caused Him to jump out now in His old age? (We\’ve read that goldfish can live up to 14 years.)
I like to blame every small creature death (like bees and dragonflies) on the 5-G relay tower a few hundred feet away from our home which I\’m told became active this past July. As a matter of fact, during a dinner party just days before His demise — one of the guests (who knew Him well) commented on the speed at which He was jetting around his fish bowl and asked what was wrong with Him. Giti and I said it must have been his recent bath that had electrified him. But she also mentioned (as I have threatened Him many times [in jest]) that if he didn\’t behave — he could easily become Sushi (it didn\’t help that that night\’s dinner featured trout).
We\’re just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year
Runnin\’ over the same old ground
and how we found, the same old fears
Wish you were here…
Well, we\’ll get on without Him — but it feels like we lost our good luck charm. And my meditations on the meaning of Life will not have the real life model of Ollie in his bowl…